A few weeks ago bf went out and bought the new iPhone, which means I got a hand-me-down iPhone! Which is awesome because never in a million years would I buy myself one (or any new piece of technology for that matter). The day I got it I entered a few of my phonebook entries, swearing that I would finish "later". Needless to say, that never happened. So, I've been surviving comfortably for almost a month without 3/4 of my phonebook.
Every once in awhile I look at my life and the people who are a part of it and realize that everything has changed. I have about seven people that I call/text on a regular basis. 4 of them don't really count as friends because they're Brian, my mom, my dad and my grandpa. I have a decent amount of "friends" but they're more like acquaintances. That's me, though.
I've never been the type of person to surround myself with other people and go to other people for advice. I'm independent. I figure things out on my own. I need "alone-time" more often than I need "friend time." I'm not the type to have a ton of girlfriends who I call to ask what clothes I should wear or how I should wear my hair or just to talk about my day. I like to go shopping, run errands, get food, etc. by myself. Some people might consider this to be anti-social, I prefer the term "self-reliant".
I learned to get on that "bff" level with a group of girlfriends in high school (which carried on until around this time last year) but I definitely had to LEARN it. It doesn't come naturally to me. I look at other girls, they call each other just to bullshit and hangout and get ice cream and that sort of thing. It's not that I don't like doing those things, it just doesn't cross my mind. I guess it depends on the person, though, sometimes friendships just evolve to that naturally. Like that girl Carla I was friends with. She and I would hangout together, I'd go over her house to hang out and watch TV, we went shopping together around Christmas, we would text about funny, unimportant things. I guess we just clicked (I still have no idea why we're not still friends, but whatever). That's not to say that I don't really like these girls I know now. I do! When we hang out we have fun, we have things to talk about, but it's always in a larger group of mixed company. The best time I've had in awhile was hanging out with them in Ocean City.
I don't want to pull the, "I get along SO MUCH BETTER with guys" card, because that seems cliche, but I do! Guys just chill. They don't call other guys for advice. They don't need help making every day decisions. They can go grab some food together without it being a whole "plan." Everything is so "whatever" and that's how friendship has to be for me. If it requires a ton of effort or attention I bolt. I run a business 6 days a week, barely have time to take care of my own things - I don't have time for a high-maintenance friendship. That's why I love Sean. He's almost always down to just chill. He knows me and either gives me the space I need or drags me out of my hermit-like tendencies without me even having to ask.
Pretty much, my ideal friend has to:
- be the perfect mix of fun, outgoing and homebody
- be able to entertain themselves and not have to hang out ALL THE TIME
- introduce me to new things
- not be a slut
- be a good person
- have good family values
- be REAL
- be 100% open and honest
- be totally aware of the fact that I don't NEED them, I want to be friends with them
- be as good to me as I am to them
- not get bent when I'm exhausted from work and just want to sit on my couch "relaxing" wearing sweatpants for hours on end
- not be judgemental
- love me for me
Inquire within!
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